Friday 2 May 2014
Influenster
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Saturday 2 June 2012
Out with the Old, and in with the New????
For the past week or more, I have kept dreaming about my time as a teenager/ young adult. It has had me thinking back to those times. I am now really missing that Jen even more then before. My life has been all about before cancer and after cancer. I find I am always saying "before cancer I used to do this... I am really missing the old me bad.
I was so active and out going, and I never stopped. I took on so many challenges just because I could, and loved to prove to myself I can do it too.
Now my big challenge seems to be if I have enough energy to get out of bed and go to the Dr's or to my BFF's house for a short visit. But always afterwards I am super tired for the next day and nap on and off all day.
This has been really bad for my confidence and spirit. My brain still runs a mile a minute and I still have all these ideas like before, but now my brain interjects on those thoughts and reminds me "ya right, you have no energy to even think about trying that". I am a very creative person by nature, and love to craft, and I haven't even been doing that. So i guess you can say I got the blues.
It is such a vicious cycle, and trying to find old me makes it harder. I mean when I look in the mirror I don't see me, but I see another person. I try to style my hair and make up as I have always done and I am to tired to even come close to finishing. Lets just say don't call and invite me out at the last minute as I wont be able to get ready lol. Thank god for jammies and track pant Capri's lol, Comfort is my game now.
So I have come to realise that the young me is no longer, and I wont be doing the things I did then. I mean my oldest son is 21 and he is doing those things now. His girlfriend, Victoria was just accepted to UofT and we are so proud. John will be venturing on a new path this Sept as he will be going with her, so new job and home. That will be really hard for me because they are going to be far away from me, and no one there to keep an eye on them for me either. I know I have to let them grow and do their thing, but I always knew what was going on, from my dad cause John worked for him.
I am still exploring my new friendship with Sheri, and loving it. It is so easy to like her and she has a crafty mind too, so I love hearing about all the things she is doing. And she is a great listener too.
my Bff is closer to the closing date on her new home. We went over one afternoon to check out the gardens (no one lives there now) the gardens were full of thistles and big ones at that. The day we picked was so hot too. Needless to say I didn't do much ( and feel bad about it) I had to keep going to the shade to sit and drink a gallon of water. But Meg made short work of it and they look 100% better. Now we got to get some nice plants for them. And then tackle the back yards gardens lol. We also had a girls night last week. I stayed till midnight and we just hung out, it was nice, cause usually she is taking me to one Dr or another.
well hubby just made some delicious smelling hamburgers, so I am going to eat my dinner.
hugs Jennyxo
I was so active and out going, and I never stopped. I took on so many challenges just because I could, and loved to prove to myself I can do it too.
Now my big challenge seems to be if I have enough energy to get out of bed and go to the Dr's or to my BFF's house for a short visit. But always afterwards I am super tired for the next day and nap on and off all day.
This has been really bad for my confidence and spirit. My brain still runs a mile a minute and I still have all these ideas like before, but now my brain interjects on those thoughts and reminds me "ya right, you have no energy to even think about trying that". I am a very creative person by nature, and love to craft, and I haven't even been doing that. So i guess you can say I got the blues.
It is such a vicious cycle, and trying to find old me makes it harder. I mean when I look in the mirror I don't see me, but I see another person. I try to style my hair and make up as I have always done and I am to tired to even come close to finishing. Lets just say don't call and invite me out at the last minute as I wont be able to get ready lol. Thank god for jammies and track pant Capri's lol, Comfort is my game now.
So I have come to realise that the young me is no longer, and I wont be doing the things I did then. I mean my oldest son is 21 and he is doing those things now. His girlfriend, Victoria was just accepted to UofT and we are so proud. John will be venturing on a new path this Sept as he will be going with her, so new job and home. That will be really hard for me because they are going to be far away from me, and no one there to keep an eye on them for me either. I know I have to let them grow and do their thing, but I always knew what was going on, from my dad cause John worked for him.
I am still exploring my new friendship with Sheri, and loving it. It is so easy to like her and she has a crafty mind too, so I love hearing about all the things she is doing. And she is a great listener too.
my Bff is closer to the closing date on her new home. We went over one afternoon to check out the gardens (no one lives there now) the gardens were full of thistles and big ones at that. The day we picked was so hot too. Needless to say I didn't do much ( and feel bad about it) I had to keep going to the shade to sit and drink a gallon of water. But Meg made short work of it and they look 100% better. Now we got to get some nice plants for them. And then tackle the back yards gardens lol. We also had a girls night last week. I stayed till midnight and we just hung out, it was nice, cause usually she is taking me to one Dr or another.
well hubby just made some delicious smelling hamburgers, so I am going to eat my dinner.
hugs Jennyxo
Tuesday 15 May 2012
New.......
Well winter turned to spring and now we are merging into summer. Everything is new again. This is especially true for me this year. I said goodbye to the best neighbor ever, as she moved to an elderly home. And as I type my new neighbor is moving in with their family. Fingers crossed that I will love them as I did the old neighbor
As for me personally my hair is growing back and starting to get longer, and I have shed some of the weight I gained during chemo. Horaay on that one ( starting to look a bit like my old me ). I am even thinking of coloring my hair someway. My son started a new season of lacrosse and is doing well. My gardens are growing, but needs my attention badly.
My BFF Meg and her family just bought a home, so a new place to visit and love. Everything is so exciting. My newer BF Sheri, well we are really getting to know each other and the great thing is we are so different but so alike too. Weird right? But I love new friendships, they are so exciting learning each others likes and dislikes.
Also I turned 40 this year, so it is new being in this age bracket. Gosh I remember when my mom turned 40 and I thought she was old then lol.
This summer I want to look at life with new eyes. I am at an age that I want to keep up with this new generation of everything electronic but also appreciate the classics too.
If you asked me a few years back if I would be reading books on my iPhone, first I'd ask what an iPhone is lol but reading on a electronic device over the comfort of paper and giving up the feel of so many pages and looking and seeing you are almost done it, and feeling sad that it is almost over. Plus wondering if their is a sequel. The e book is do different. I haven't found the comfort with it as I do with print books. Also I never know if I am nearing the end by just looking. I have to push a button and see what page I am at. I haven't tried the bubble bath and a e book yet. It is kinda scary, don't want to drowned my phone lol.
But I am looking forward to a lot of news this year. I hope I accept them easily as I tend to stick to old reliable habits. I am even going to try new styles and make up. Not going to be so predictable.
So till next time, I hope you enjoy something new ( don't be afraid to step out of the box! Cause I will be stepping right along with you )
Loves and hugs
Jenny XO
As for me personally my hair is growing back and starting to get longer, and I have shed some of the weight I gained during chemo. Horaay on that one ( starting to look a bit like my old me ). I am even thinking of coloring my hair someway. My son started a new season of lacrosse and is doing well. My gardens are growing, but needs my attention badly.
My BFF Meg and her family just bought a home, so a new place to visit and love. Everything is so exciting. My newer BF Sheri, well we are really getting to know each other and the great thing is we are so different but so alike too. Weird right? But I love new friendships, they are so exciting learning each others likes and dislikes.
Also I turned 40 this year, so it is new being in this age bracket. Gosh I remember when my mom turned 40 and I thought she was old then lol.
This summer I want to look at life with new eyes. I am at an age that I want to keep up with this new generation of everything electronic but also appreciate the classics too.
If you asked me a few years back if I would be reading books on my iPhone, first I'd ask what an iPhone is lol but reading on a electronic device over the comfort of paper and giving up the feel of so many pages and looking and seeing you are almost done it, and feeling sad that it is almost over. Plus wondering if their is a sequel. The e book is do different. I haven't found the comfort with it as I do with print books. Also I never know if I am nearing the end by just looking. I have to push a button and see what page I am at. I haven't tried the bubble bath and a e book yet. It is kinda scary, don't want to drowned my phone lol.
But I am looking forward to a lot of news this year. I hope I accept them easily as I tend to stick to old reliable habits. I am even going to try new styles and make up. Not going to be so predictable.
So till next time, I hope you enjoy something new ( don't be afraid to step out of the box! Cause I will be stepping right along with you )
Loves and hugs
Jenny XO
Wednesday 18 April 2012
It has been a hellish day!
You know when you wake up and you just get the feeling it is going to be one of those days.
Well mine started when I went to get the mail outside my front door and saw the mail lady heading next door to drop off theirs. I got a parcel notice. How it normally works is they knock on your door and give it to you or they leave it in the mailbox or I'm between the doors and if that doesn't work they leave it at my kitchen door and throw one of the recycling bins over it in case of rain. Phewweee that was a mouthful lol. So my mail lady didn't knock and tool my parcel. I called our post master and my parcel is now off the tracking grid. So many phone calls later I managed to find it and the postal service didn't help at all.
I also had to deal with a twit who works for my insurance broker oh one of my proscription got all mixed up a
and I am taking a lower dose then I should and my body knows it
I also got a call from my youngest sons teacher but I got good need there.
So here is hoping for a better day tomorrow.
I have been playing with the nail polish and have come up with some great nail art. I will post pics one of these days lol.
I should be heading to bed but am a little hooked on a online book series and sooo hard to put down.
I will try and blogg some more soon. Not like I got more then 2 subbies I think not sure anymore lol
Well good evening
Hugs
Jenny
Well mine started when I went to get the mail outside my front door and saw the mail lady heading next door to drop off theirs. I got a parcel notice. How it normally works is they knock on your door and give it to you or they leave it in the mailbox or I'm between the doors and if that doesn't work they leave it at my kitchen door and throw one of the recycling bins over it in case of rain. Phewweee that was a mouthful lol. So my mail lady didn't knock and tool my parcel. I called our post master and my parcel is now off the tracking grid. So many phone calls later I managed to find it and the postal service didn't help at all.
I also had to deal with a twit who works for my insurance broker oh one of my proscription got all mixed up a
and I am taking a lower dose then I should and my body knows it
I also got a call from my youngest sons teacher but I got good need there.
So here is hoping for a better day tomorrow.
I have been playing with the nail polish and have come up with some great nail art. I will post pics one of these days lol.
I should be heading to bed but am a little hooked on a online book series and sooo hard to put down.
I will try and blogg some more soon. Not like I got more then 2 subbies I think not sure anymore lol
Well good evening
Hugs
Jenny
Thursday 5 April 2012
My Easter version of Easter eggs
I wanted to do the Easter eggs but with a touch of flair. I used jewel tones and kept sleek lines. But an Easter egg could be decorated the way I did my nails. Oh it was so easy for me to do also.
What do you think of them?
Jenny
What do you think of them?
Jenny
My eyes have been opened.
I have been watching the beauty gurus for a few months now on you tube. Now I don't think I was aware that there is so many products out there also that there is a thing called drug store to high end on make up. I used to go to any drug store, and pick up what I needed to refill and always looked for sale items not looking for brand and reputation. So by watching all these videos the first thing I have learned was "WOW" there is a lot of things to purchase.
One day I stumbled across this website that sold items dirt cheap. I was so proud and shared with a few of my girlfriends. So of course my bff Meg and I put in a huge order each. When it came it was like Christmas. Now I didn't know anything about quality of make up or it's assesories. We thought we just won the jackpot. Now I am not saying their product sucks because we both have found some gems there. Plus awesome gifts for the huge amount of nieces I have.
Now I know about higher end products. But I have to shop for them online as our Canadian drug stores just sell drug store brands. And to go to a Mac counter I have a very long drive to the city to go see expensive make up.
But I feel like I have been missing out all these years on these higher end products. I mean I don't own any of those brands. My make up consists of Elf, cover girl, revlon, almay.
I am such a girl at times cause it would make my year to own 1 thing from urban decay or Mac, how about an item from this store call sephora. Never mind something from Chanel or Doir.
I have always been good at make up and hair. I can't tell you how many times I do other peoples faces for prom or weddings or for just a night out. And I could cut my hair and my friends like any bodies business
I rocked my cosmology classes.
Here I am 40 yrs old and dying to own any of above mentioned items. But sadly I can't afford it.
Again Breast Cancer still costs a lot even though we have health care here in Canada so now I feel like that 12 or 13 yr old girl with big longing to own something totally out of my reach.
I have even gone as far as entering contests to try and win something. No luck yet really. But I know to win some of these products would be huge to me.
I am still having a hard time looking in the mirror because I still haven't gotten used to this new face. I mean I did have the old me for 38+ years. I just want to look pretty or cute again. But so much has changed for me. My hair is curly and lots of grey now. My skin is so dry and putting foundation on my T zone looks so dry and flakey. Even after I moisturized it.
So to sum up my feelings here would be DAM where have I been to not know there was such wonderful products out there ( I am going off of the gurus words lol) also it has in a way made me feel young, cause I can't afford it now, like when I was a tween.
So question is how can I try these products on no budget. And sadly the answer is I can't.
I also have been seeing more of these type of high end items on tv commercials, I am dying to try the WEN products for your hair and I have heard about all these wonderful scents.
So I will close out this blog wishing I had a fairy God mother or a Santa that would just give me some items so I can join in and rave about them too.
I also want to try hair extensions to as I am lost without my long hair, I think it helped me identify with myself cause I have always had long hair.
So if you are a fairy God mother or Santa and want to make my year please think of putting a package on my table. Sorry just dreaming there again. So till next time
Hugs and Love XOXO
Jenny
One day I stumbled across this website that sold items dirt cheap. I was so proud and shared with a few of my girlfriends. So of course my bff Meg and I put in a huge order each. When it came it was like Christmas. Now I didn't know anything about quality of make up or it's assesories. We thought we just won the jackpot. Now I am not saying their product sucks because we both have found some gems there. Plus awesome gifts for the huge amount of nieces I have.
Now I know about higher end products. But I have to shop for them online as our Canadian drug stores just sell drug store brands. And to go to a Mac counter I have a very long drive to the city to go see expensive make up.
But I feel like I have been missing out all these years on these higher end products. I mean I don't own any of those brands. My make up consists of Elf, cover girl, revlon, almay.
I am such a girl at times cause it would make my year to own 1 thing from urban decay or Mac, how about an item from this store call sephora. Never mind something from Chanel or Doir.
I have always been good at make up and hair. I can't tell you how many times I do other peoples faces for prom or weddings or for just a night out. And I could cut my hair and my friends like any bodies business
I rocked my cosmology classes.
Here I am 40 yrs old and dying to own any of above mentioned items. But sadly I can't afford it.
Again Breast Cancer still costs a lot even though we have health care here in Canada so now I feel like that 12 or 13 yr old girl with big longing to own something totally out of my reach.
I have even gone as far as entering contests to try and win something. No luck yet really. But I know to win some of these products would be huge to me.
I am still having a hard time looking in the mirror because I still haven't gotten used to this new face. I mean I did have the old me for 38+ years. I just want to look pretty or cute again. But so much has changed for me. My hair is curly and lots of grey now. My skin is so dry and putting foundation on my T zone looks so dry and flakey. Even after I moisturized it.
So to sum up my feelings here would be DAM where have I been to not know there was such wonderful products out there ( I am going off of the gurus words lol) also it has in a way made me feel young, cause I can't afford it now, like when I was a tween.
So question is how can I try these products on no budget. And sadly the answer is I can't.
I also have been seeing more of these type of high end items on tv commercials, I am dying to try the WEN products for your hair and I have heard about all these wonderful scents.
So I will close out this blog wishing I had a fairy God mother or a Santa that would just give me some items so I can join in and rave about them too.
I also want to try hair extensions to as I am lost without my long hair, I think it helped me identify with myself cause I have always had long hair.
So if you are a fairy God mother or Santa and want to make my year please think of putting a package on my table. Sorry just dreaming there again. So till next time
Hugs and Love XOXO
Jenny
Wednesday 4 April 2012
Still kicking around.
Well it has been a very busy few days. I did go to the Dr's at the breast health center and had a ultra sound done but the tech couldn't get to the back of them cause they are real deep. I am waiting to get a MRI done still and to see my plastic dr'. They said they don't think it is cancer (which I don't trust cause who would on a don't think). But they agree something is going on there. So I again am playing the wait and see game. This time around has really affected my youngest son even though we reassure him things are fine. Just goes to show that your kids know things and that our life really affects them big time too. Luke acted out at school by refusing to do his work and distruped the class. I hope now that I and a school conceller have talked with him that things will settle down. Fingers crossed.
So I got a rude awaking this week well yesterday. Let me explain better. I used to take care of our financial stuff but let my hubby take it over while I was sick. The thing is we both have a different approach on how to do them. So yesterday when I went to wash my hands and found we didn't have water I freaked out. Hubby wouldn't answer the cell so I went on a scavenger hunt for all our bills. What a rude awakening I had when I found them. Some were not even open. After about an hour of sorting them and reading them thru tears I had figured out how poorly my husband handled it. I will say I am not perfect but I never owed more then $300.00 in our home bills. I pay everything in full and ontime even if I will have to do without any spending money. Well I couldn't believe how far behind he was and some of the amounts oweing. I also found out that he had kept from me other things like our house insurance was gone ad April 1st and we are waiting for our broker to get us a new company. You think after 8yrs with one company you can trust them. Not so much. So now my mortgage company is giving us 15days till they will call default for us not having insurance. And then me finding out all of the money we owe on home and credit card bills. Well it broke me yesterday. I was crying and hurt and do stressed out because of it. So I sat down thru tears and wrote out what was oweing to who and intrest rates where they applied. When hubby got home I handed it to him and told him my feelings about it all. I also didn't mention I called my dad and I told Bill he needs to take them and go see my father now. My dad owns a few stores well deli butcher shops and has been handling that finace for over 20 years. And hopefully my dad can show Bill how to put things back on track. I think I will be slowly taking this mess back over but I refuse to fix this for him cause then he will never learn either. So no shopping for this girl for a long while and that is going to be tough for me cause I like shinny new stuff too.
Hopefully things will go back to the way they ate supposed to be. I did get my water back this morning thank god.
So I needed to let off some nervous energy and since I am not that mobile yet. So I painted my nails and I wanted an Easter egg like design so I did these neat stripes but not in Easter colors so I will post a pick to share. I will do my best to keep pooring my thoughts and feelings here. I also wanted to mention I got my model mirror this week and I will try and post pic's here too of that. Maybe you can guess which one I got lol
Thanks again for reading my babble but it is so true about writing your feelings out
Hugs and Love
Jenny
So I got a rude awaking this week well yesterday. Let me explain better. I used to take care of our financial stuff but let my hubby take it over while I was sick. The thing is we both have a different approach on how to do them. So yesterday when I went to wash my hands and found we didn't have water I freaked out. Hubby wouldn't answer the cell so I went on a scavenger hunt for all our bills. What a rude awakening I had when I found them. Some were not even open. After about an hour of sorting them and reading them thru tears I had figured out how poorly my husband handled it. I will say I am not perfect but I never owed more then $300.00 in our home bills. I pay everything in full and ontime even if I will have to do without any spending money. Well I couldn't believe how far behind he was and some of the amounts oweing. I also found out that he had kept from me other things like our house insurance was gone ad April 1st and we are waiting for our broker to get us a new company. You think after 8yrs with one company you can trust them. Not so much. So now my mortgage company is giving us 15days till they will call default for us not having insurance. And then me finding out all of the money we owe on home and credit card bills. Well it broke me yesterday. I was crying and hurt and do stressed out because of it. So I sat down thru tears and wrote out what was oweing to who and intrest rates where they applied. When hubby got home I handed it to him and told him my feelings about it all. I also didn't mention I called my dad and I told Bill he needs to take them and go see my father now. My dad owns a few stores well deli butcher shops and has been handling that finace for over 20 years. And hopefully my dad can show Bill how to put things back on track. I think I will be slowly taking this mess back over but I refuse to fix this for him cause then he will never learn either. So no shopping for this girl for a long while and that is going to be tough for me cause I like shinny new stuff too.
Hopefully things will go back to the way they ate supposed to be. I did get my water back this morning thank god.
So I needed to let off some nervous energy and since I am not that mobile yet. So I painted my nails and I wanted an Easter egg like design so I did these neat stripes but not in Easter colors so I will post a pick to share. I will do my best to keep pooring my thoughts and feelings here. I also wanted to mention I got my model mirror this week and I will try and post pic's here too of that. Maybe you can guess which one I got lol
Thanks again for reading my babble but it is so true about writing your feelings out
Hugs and Love
Jenny
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